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Monday, October 30, 2006 

I've Got So Many Problems

That aren't really problems. I just like to bitch.

So I got a new job... because I was thinking of ways to take the phrase, 'went postal' to new levels.

DrinkJack was here... did I mention that? He's cool. Even though he drank wine... I drank wine too. Did I just admit that? Fuck. I must be drunk... on MOONSHINE. That's how bad ass I am. Cindylou and I talked a lot, so much that I became afraid he was going to get up to go to the bathroom and never come back. I might not have blamed him if that did happen, but it didn't. And so he got to stay long enough for Cindy Lou to tell a racial joke to strangers and completely offend them! HA! They actually left right afterwards and all I can say is thank GOD that part of my memory isn't fuzzy. Because I will cherish that moment until the end of time.

So one of the things I told DrinkJack was how a lot of my posts aren't ranting about what I'm actually pissed about. In general, I become pissed about ONE thing, then I just start cursing humanity. There are days that I'm in the parking lot screaming into my hand, taking my shoes off just to throw them into a bush or the side of my house, nights when I want to kill someone and so I break something I own instead.

I got a new job. Hopefully that will take care of the whole, 'screaming in the parking lot' scenario. Because the janitor's starting to look at me funny.

I hate getting older though, because looking for a job took the LONGEST FUCKING TIME!!


There were so many GODDAMMED concerns this time round! Like, what's the pay ratio, well that's not what I'm worth. Do I like these people? What kind of industry is this? Does this, or can this fit into future plans? What's the bonus like (bonus? HOLY FUCKING SHIT I'M A GROWN UP)? What's the office like? Because at this point in my life I've become accustomed to certain standards.

That's right bitch.

I have standards.

Not very 'high' standards, but standards none the less.

So now here I am, finally with a job that meets most of my minimum requirements, and I'm told, no, WARNED, not to give notice until my background check comes back.

Cuz I'm all fight club, top secret alter persona, anarchist. That's right bitch. At night I break into womens stores and exchange all the size 0 tags for 4. Take that you skinny rich bitches!!

But I gave my notice anyway. Without the background check results. And I feel wierd and panicked, but I think secretly okay. Because let's say my background check doesn't come back okay, and I lose this super amazing, 40 percent pay raise job (gulp).

It'll be okay.

And I'll be okay.

I'll temp, I'll contract, I'll find another job. And I won't be here. And that'll be just fine.