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Thursday, October 12, 2006 

I'd Like To Switch Teams

I have something against ugly women. It's like, GOD, put on some damn makeup! I think the seal would willingly die if it could see you right now and know that it was dying for such a worthy cause.


Some women are really really hideous. I saw this skank driving a van, smoking a cigarrette with man hands, big ole bushy hair flying around in a frizzy ponytail, and the only reason I could tell she wasn't a man was the fact that her XXL shirt was pink. Her hands and arms were disgusting, and even her face was all pinchy looking. How she managed that when she was way over two hundred pounds I don't have a clue.

Then, while I was sitting there trying to block that out, a woman in a BMW drove by. She was very nicely dressed, hair all frosted and highlighted, with a face that looked like it had just smelled another dog's butt.

My point is, I would be ashamed of what these women do for the rest of us, but I don't think we're even in the same category. Not that I'm super hot, but I'm pretty positive that if I've ever made anyone throw up in their mouth a little bit, it was in a good way.

Or an on purpose, I just put anti freeze in your ice tea, way.


I'm out of here. Between today and Sunday I'm going to be on six different flights. That's right. Six. Kill me now. I'm going to New York. But not the good kind of New York. The kind of New York where people own tractors and make out with their sisters. I'm not even sure if they've ever seen a Puerto Rican out there, so I'm hoping I'm not sold into slavery.

Green acres is the place to be... Farm living is the life for ME