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Wednesday, June 28, 2006 

I Would Like To Talk About Stupid Stuff Now

*I don't know why but my toe nails are so dry they always crack and break off at the very first chance they get. It's like I'm too tall for the nutrients to get all the way down there, and frankly it really ticks me off.

I want pretty feet TOO!

I hate my stupid feet and stupid toe nails and think them to be quite ugly, of course I judge them against my girl friends (and everyone knows I am only friends w/the pretty girls) and feet models. But every time I see a philipino or hawaiian girls' feet I shudder. Then contemplate being violently ill. What is up with the long scraggly unpainted toe nails, dry cracked feet and NO NAIL POLISH in open toed shoes?

I don't want to get all racist here and shit, but I work in a predominantly asian industry, and after a few years you start to notice a few things. Like the fact that fish microwaved does not smell good, and they're feet are NASTY. Ugg. Anyway, my toe nail cracked on the side directly above my cuticle this time. It doesn't hurt, thank god, but if it falls off do you know how long it's going to take to cover up my skin?


Great, now I feel like kicking something 'til all my toe nails fall off.

* So I bought a new nail kit (to help take care of the cracked nail), and inside was this plastic cuticle pusher (I hate those stupid dowel sticks) that had a cuticle trimmer attached.

I've never seen this before, so of course I had to buy it.

And then as soon as I got home I started pushing and trimming all of my cuticles. ALL OF THEM.

Even on my feet, where little to no cuticle skin exists.

After a few moments of staring in wonder at my freshly trimmed cuticles and looking for any stray skin that could be massacred I realized my OCD was kicking in. Overtime. The need to cut my cuticles for the next eight hours was overwhelming, overpowering, I was WISHING for my cuticles to grow back merely so I cut them again. So carefully and with much restraint, I put the new nail kit away.

Really, I can't be trusted.

*The Irishman lives so far away (a three hour round trip) that our weeks often become strained. We tend to bicker over stupid things due to lack of sleep or him being a petulant child that wants me to drive up even though I have to be at work earlier than he does in addition to having multiple needy whiny animals at home. Basically, it's all his fault.


So recently we got a book on how to deal w/long distance relationships, and it's actually pretty cool. We've started a phone movie night, so last night we called each other up, chatted for a bit, then hung up to watch Roman Holiday, and then talked again after the movie.

First off, Audrey Hepburn is beyond pretty. She really really is. And I LOVE her eyebrows! Second, now I have to watch The Silent Man, or the quiet man or some other bullshit w/John Wayne that he swears is not a western, but I don't like John Wayne! I NEVER EVER HAVE!

And he's already seen the movie, I hadn't seen Roman Holiday, so in some ass backwards way I feel as if he's punishing me.

I guess I should just shut up and be thankful that he didn't pick out a Ronald Reagan movie. Le sigh.

* We're supposed to go to Boston next week, and I'm trying to figure out what to pack. Trying to plan what to pack it occurred to me that first I should figure out what the weather is, so I looked it up. Which reminds me, who in the fuck invented humidity? Telling me it's 78 degrees with 91 percent humidity doesn't really tell me shit. I'M FROM CALIFORNIA.

Stupid fucking weather people.

From now on I would like the weather to be described in the following format.

Osama Bin Laden, butt sweat hot
Convertible weather for your bald Ex weather
Casual shorts comfy weather
Better bring pants and a sweater weather
Don't forget your umbrella and forget your hair looking nice
If we didn't have GPS and cell phones you might have to call yourself Donner and eat your friends winter

The fucking end.


I Can't Help You Now - Look, I have two songs on my hard drive that don't have the name 'iTunes' tatooed to their asses, so suck it
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