Chronicles of Madness

[You get to answer any five of these and then add your own occupations]
If I could be a scientist
If I could be a farmer
If I could be a musician
If I could be a doctor
If I could be a painter
If I could be a gardener
If I could be a missionary
If I could be a chef
If I could be an architect
If I could be a linguist
If I could be a librarian
If I could be an athlete
If I could be a lawyer
If I could be an innkeeper
If I could be a professor
If I could be a writer
If I could be a llama-rider(by Ogre)
If I could be a bonnie pirate(By Teach)
If I could be a servicemember(By Jeremy)
If I could be a business owner(By Blue 944)
If I could be an actor(By Blue 944)
If I could be an agent(By KelBel)
If I could be video game designer(By KelBel)
If I could be a comic book artist(By Stoli)
If I could be a hooker(By Pollo Loco)
If I could be a crack addict(by Elizabeth)
If I could be a porn star(by Elizabeth)
If I could be a mime(by Garrison)
If I could be a domestic engineer(by Rick)
If I could be a chimney sweep(by laine)
If I could be a masseuse(by laine)
If I could be a taxi driver(by Brian)
If I could be a priest(by Brian)
If I could be the Sherrif Of Nottingham(Karen)
If I could be a dancer(Karen)
If I could be Santa Claus(Karen)
If I could be on a reality TV show(Dawn)
If I could be a magician(Dawn)
If I could be a rich man
If I could be perfect
If I could be a comedian
If I could be invisible
If I could be a Korean(by Ty)
If I could be a blogger(by Ty)
If I could be a pervert(by Ty)
If I could be a digital camera(by Ty)
If I could be the guy who gets to be alone with you(by Ty)
If I could be a man for a day (grace)
If I could be a superhero (grace)
If I could be YOUR MOMMA (grace)
If I could be the one you never forget (Terra)
If I could be a rock star (Terra)
If I could be a paid killer(Terra)
If I could be a police officer (Terra)

If I could be a man for a day I'd use everything I know to make some woman think I was a God.

If I could be a lawyer I'd sue the shit out of my ex-roomie. Fucker.

If I could be a police officer I'd beat the shit out of minorities w/my billy club.

If I could be a dancer I'd make tons of money down at the Pink Poodle ;)

If I could be a scientist I'd sew two heads onto one body and display it at the fair... come get me now Superhero Grace.