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Tuesday, November 08, 2005 

In All My Past Life's I Had a Short Fuse (or, the reruns begineth)

Things that are pissing me off today: People who talk the fuck over you.



Ok. I just need to breathe, and remind myself that I am a good Christian.

Good Christians don’t leave bloody boot prints on the ground.

Also I’m not one of those hypocritical born agains that you just want to punch in the mouth until your fist is broken.

Good Christian, good Christian.

Maybe if I repeat it enough times it will suddenly come true.

Here’s what I mean about talking over you, you know those people who when you explain something put there own spin on it, and it always makes you look like a retarded asshole? I fuckin hate those people. I say, “oh shoot, my girl friend stayed the night at my house and we must have switched shoes” and later I hear them telling people, she’s such a fucking drunk she can’t even find her shoes.


Or, how about people who twist everything you say to mean that you are JUST like THEM. GAR! What’s the point of having a fucking conversation with these fucking people when they’re just going to make up whatever they want to hear anyway? Shit I don’t even need to be in the room for this fuck you fest.

If there’s a God I hope they go to hell, where I get to torture them by ripping out their tongues, unhinging their jaws and shoving communication manuals down their throats.

Good Christian, good Christian.

You know, sometimes this whole, turn the other cheek thing kinda rubs raw. I am fucking INFAMOUS for second chances. Ask any one of my friends, my name is synonymous with, “door mat. ”

Why? That’s an interesting question considering my numerous anger management issues and my tendency to acerbically point out people’s stupidity at the drop of a hat. But, unbelievably, that’s exactly why I forgive people.

I fuck up all the time, not because I’m mean and I enjoy seeing you cry after I tell you what a twat you are, although seriously, use your fucking brain, but because I’m human. I FEEL bad when I make people cry, I don’t intend to forget birthdays, I would like to show up to everything I’m invited to but sometimes I’m just overbooked, plain fucking tired, or, well, sick of you right now.

Oh, and hey that day I chewed you out? I might have been PMSing, or pissed that I was being required to conversate… and may have been making a list of all the reasons I don’t like you in my head. Fuck, sometimes I’m just a bitch for no reason other than I feel like it.


So fuck off.

I realize that if I’m asking you to forgive my shortcomings then I am required to forgive you yours. Yelled at me? Ok, maybe you had a bad day. I have bad days too. Just say you’re sorry later and we’re cool. But forgiving people for the same thing over and over? It gets old.

I forgive people, but if I have to make a habit of it? Well then I need to rethink why I allow them in my atmosphere.

I close doors though, and never look back.

That’s the other thing I’m infamous for. Closing doors on peoples necks, while kicking them in the ass with my boots.

I’ve thought a lot about killing people… and how to get away with it.

Don’t fuck with me.