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Tuesday, April 19, 2005 

Blog Ho Is Offensive... I Wanna Be Offensive Too!

So...

I wish I was black. Cuz I'd use it as an excuse to be hella ghetto. I'd play dominoes all day and wear gold teeth. When people borrowed money from me and didn't pay me back I would say, "Where's my motherfucking money punk?" and if they didn't have it I would bang the table until all the dominoes fell on the floor saying, "I know you have my motherfuckin money cuz I know I saw you up on third last week with a brand new jacket." And then if they started stuttering about how they can't pay me I would look around muttering, "Oh no he didn't. Oh no he didn't. Motherfucka didn't just walk up into MY crib in a brand new fucking jacket without MY money acting like we all cool and shit!". I would say "skrill" and I would punch random people in the mouth just because I was black. Anytime anything went wrong I would say the "man" was keeping me down. I would also drink 40's and holla "Punk Ass Bitch!!" at random men passing by my front stoop.

I would dress like a gangsta and when people rolled up their car windows I would lunge at them, showing them my gold filled grill.... and then I would try to sell them a watch.

Roomie: If I was ghetto I'd steal your motherfuckin rims and shank your ass right after I slept with your babies daddy and stole your food stamps. Now what?!

ya (head roll, shoulder shrug, cuz I'm a badass. You know )

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I never got further than the big furry jacket when I tried to be a gangster...

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