« Home | Reasons I Don't Have Power » | sat uh day » | I'll Tell You A Secret About Me » | Places I've Noticed Lately » | Implants Are Cool, Too Bad I Don't Have Any » | Ty and Grace Made Me Do It... CL You're Next » | Proceed With Caution » | I Want to Blah Blah Blog » | » | A Little Less Pink and a Tad More Bitchy... » 

Monday, May 09, 2005 

Introspection Is Ceasing to Amuse Me

Fall, fall, down the rabbit hole.

Alice I’ve got you now. Dirty apron… what will mother say?

I ran away from my problems today.

And I am… not lost. I am found, wandering corridors you cannot track me down. Hello hello? You hear that? No echo. These, you see, are not empty rooms. They are filled, to the brim, with furniture and childhood whims; covered up with old white aprons. To protect them from the dust, the years, the demands of men, bills, rent, and yes… children.

There is my slinky, rescued from the tree I wrapped it to tight, my game boy, my first bike. Today, though, I’m avoiding the army men and military trucks. Today I’ll wear lip gloss and sip tea from a plastic cup. I know, I know we have very important things to discuss. Like where I’ve been, what I’ve seen and whether or not you’re still in love with me.

But for right now…. For right right now, let me enjoy this moment of reflection. The mirrors are covered, my appearance uninspected. I am eight again, a princess undiscovered, lost in the wilderness of white. And you? You are nothing. Not even my shining knight.

I had too many barbies. Not enough money for ken. You are due at eight. I will grow up then.