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Monday, July 17, 2006 

I've Since Calmed Down... Sorta

Apparently today is national fuckwatt day and, yet again, no one has bothered to inform me.
 
And since it is national fuckwatt day I am assuming that EVERYONE'S brain has been affected and so therefore, someone on this godforsaken planet can explain to me:
 
One: Why you feel the need to restate everything I say in a super slow monotone voice and then finally conclude with, "Oh, well, can't help you there."
 
Newsflash, I didn't fucking ask you to diagnose the problem, I told you the problem, told you how to fix it, asked if you were the correct person to be speaking with, and yet you somehow still couldn't understand that the string of consonants and vowels coming out of my mouth were forming words which then went on to make up sentences.
 
Fucktard.
 
Two: Why, when you say one thing, such as sugar, do you automatically assume that I know what you actually mean is Equal, when there is a big jar of sugar sitting right in front of us, and then, when I ask for clarification, act as if I'm the stupid one?
 
I almost, would rather sit on my fat ass collecting unemployment, or welfare, or even WIC, watching Dr. Phil (which I detest), while my fat ass grew fatter, then listen to this bullshit one millisecond longer.
 
But no, I've decided I'm going to keep going to work, and keep putting up with people that prove natural selection doesn't work, just so I can get into heaven.
 
Boy, heaven better exist or I'm going to kick Jesus right in the teeth.

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I Can't Help You Now - Look, I have two songs on my hard drive that don't have the name 'iTunes' tatooed to their asses, so suck it
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